PHONE:
FAX:
757.962.8052
757.962.8057
EMAIL: General Inquiries: relativetheory[at]mac.com
Sales: orders[at]relativetheoryrecords.com
Booking: shows[at]relativetheoryrecords.com
Art Gallery: gallery[at]relativetheoryrecords.com

Dear People,

First and foremost we will be working more and more with AIGA (American Institure of Graphic Arts) - the Hampton Roads chapter - so this Thursday we are having a lecture from Jakob Trollback who is the founder and creator of Trollback & Co. This company's work is very clean and invoke the greatest amount of movement with minimal amount of effort. Their portfolio is very impressive and quite fun to view - the flyer is below, please be sure to note. In other news, still have yet to figure out how to get the store's sound streaming online and from looking into online radio servers it looks as if we would have to shell out the large bills to get it up and running and quite frankly we dont think it is a good idea since we would probably have 20-25 listeners at this stage in the game. So instead of getting that going we have been spending our time helping out ForKids in getting ready for their annual art auction this Friday at the Granby Theater. You can purchase your tickets here at Relative so be sure to mark your calendars. If you can't make it there is always First Giving through Moustache May! Donate a small gift to help this local non-profit change your community. If you spend money where you live then the place you live will become better. If you think what we provide at Relative Theory is the cat's pajamas just think how many cat's we could make happy if you bought all of your cds here. I dont know what I am talking about. See you next week.

associated links
www.moustachemay.com
www.firstgiving.com/moustachesforkids
www.homesforkids.org (ForKids)
www.trollback.com


MAY 16th, 2006 Issue No. 018
 
ITEMS FOR SALE

Boris
Brian Jonestown Massacre
Don Caballero
Faun Fables
Mason Jennings
Melvins
The Raconteurs
Radio 4
Russian Circles
Thievery Corporation
Red Sparowes / Battle of Mice / Made Out of Babies
T Bone Burnet
Twilight Singers
V/A - Pickin' and Singin'
The Wedding Present

Reissues: Dinosaur Jr.


Out of The Box 89.5 FM
selections from your favorite independent radio program

Under The Microscope
take a closer look on some titles you may have missed

EVENTS | SHOWS TUES MAY 16 | 8pm
Paleo w/Johanna Kunin, Great White Jenkins, & OK Bird
Tickets: $5 adv | $7 day of show

WED MAY 17 | 8pm
Elevado w/ 9volt Penpal
Tickets $5 adv | $7 day of show

THURS MAY 18 | 7pm
Jakob Trollback AIGA meeting
Tickets FREE for AIGA members and first time guests | $30 non-members | $5 students

FRI MAY 19 | 8pm
The Silent Years w/Foxes Thru Fences & Headlights
Tickets: $5 adv | $7 day of show

SAT MAY 20 | 8pm
Ghostfinger w/Still Pink, The Fame, & The Beat Strings
Tickets $5 adv | $7 day of show

SUN MAY 21 | 10pm
Ghostfinger
@ the Ghent TAPHOUSE
Ages 21 and up
Tickets $5

SUN MAY 21 | 8pm
The Season Think Tank, and Joanna Lynne
Tickets $5 adv | $7 day of show

MON MAY 22 | 8pm
Tel Aviv w/The Luxury Flats
Tickets $5 adv | $7 day of show

TUES MAY 23 | 8pm
Epic at Best w/Langly Holland, Lacrymosa, & Lacrymosa
Tickets $5 adv | $7 day of show
IN THE GALLERY

Exhibition: Simply Said
Artist: Said Martinez-Calderon
MAY 14 - MAY 30

NOW SERVING Regular - Organic Sumatra
Flavor of the Week - Southern Butter Pecan
Decaf - Decaf Costa Rican
Relative Special - $2 lattes, mochas, cappucinos- any size, any milk selection
New To The Menu Pom Juice in 5 flavors! Organic Trail Mixes! Newman's Organics! Peach Vitamin H20!
Do your friends get this update?

Pass along the good word.



Moustache May is here and now you will learn.

Be sure to check out firstgiving.com to see how moustache
fun helps homeless children in Hampton Roads.




   

Boris
Pink

Release Date: 05/16/06
Label: Southern Lord
CD: $13.98

Relative Recommends! The brand new studio album from Boris: Pink. Followers of the band already know that each release Boris will do something unexpected, entirely unique, and continually forging in a new direction. Pink is absolutely no exception! However, for possibly the first time these new recordings effectively combine all the strongest elements of what Boris is capable of into one solid, complete, concise album. The mega-drone of Amplifier Worship is apparent in songs like: (track 5), the balls-out punk rock is evident (track 4 and track 9), extreme dark-psychedelia manifests itself track 8 and 10) and the '70s fuzzed out acid rock is represented in foot stomping tracks like the title track and track 3. The clincher on Pink and new element that is brought to the table is an infusion of ultra-catchy melodicism into their already heavy foundation. The album opener and closer as well as title track contain infectious vocal melodies that, combined with intelligent song-writing, create a solidified, undeniable union. As with all previous Boris releases on Southern Lord, the packaging is uniquely psychedelic with the utmost attention to detail created by Stephen O' Malley . Pink comes with a die-cut cover that when opened reveals 3 perforated acid-tab cards!

Genre/Style: Rock / Stoner / Psyche


Brian Jonestown Massacre
Tepid Peppermint Wonderland Vol. 2

Release Date: 05/16/06
Label: Tee Pee
LP: $19.98

All you need to know is this. Limited to 750 copies. Gatefold. Blood red vinyl.

Genre/Style: Rock / Psychedelic

Don Caballero
World Class Listening Problem

Release Date: 05/16/06
Label: Relapse
CD: $15.98
The legendary Don Caballero has re-emerged! Inarguably one of the most celebrated, influential and innovative bands in recent times, Don Caballero is the vanguard of progressive, instrumental music. With World Class Listening Problem, its first full-length album in almost 5 years, Don Cab proves once again that they are head and shoulders above their peers. The bands powerful, percussive-heavy sonic advance is more dense, more expansive, and burns with a newfound urgency. World Class Listening Problem is prime Don Caballero and an indispensable addition to the illustrious Don Cab canon.

Genre/Style: Instrumental / Math Rock
Faun Fables
Transit Rider

Release Date: 05/16/06
Label: Drag City
CD: $15.98
A rider is born into the transit system- a network of roads, rails, corridors and trails that extends in all directions and meets itself on the far side of the world. In a setting of ongoing motion among strangers & fluorescent lights, limping dogs & sightless beggars and the breathless pace of urban anthems, she will carve a faintly beaten path through the singing landscape with the rhythm of the tracks to find her very own stop: a picnic.
This selection of songs draws from a theme that began in 1994 - when Dawn was introduced to the complete world of the NYC subway in all its repetitious and transient glory and began writing about it. It was made into a full length theater show in 2002 in San Francisco, aided by the inspiration & work of director Allen Willner and a cast of thirteen. Since then The Transit Rider has seen more roadways and sunsets and has enjoyed further songwriting & development by Dawn and Nils, plus collaborations with Dawn's mother Michelina Tyrie ('Earths Kiss') and a poem by her dad Will McCarthy ('I No Longer Wish To') written during his last days as a stock broker. This Transit Rider also incorporates into its setting songs from Zygmunt Konieczny (Taki Pejzaz/Such a Landscape), Soeur Sourire (Je Voudrais/I'd like to Be), and the Anglo Saxon traditional 'House Carpenter.' Its debut release will be celebrated with a remounting of the theater show, newly adapted, which will tour all over in the times to come......along the network of roads, rails, corridors and trails that extends in all directions and meets itself on the far side of the world.
Genre/Style: Folk / Traditional
Mason Jennings
Boneclouds

Release Date: 05/16/06
Label: Glacial Pace
CD: $15.98
LP: $15.98
Mason's voice and lyrics are undeniable: whether he is singing sweet, lilting love songs, ranting with embittered rage over societal injustices, or pleasing for understanding with a childlike innocence. His themes are universal and have played a major part in garnering Mason a large and loyal international following. On any given album, Mason will touch upon pain, love, loss, religion, joy, evil, politics and human frailty. Simply put, Mason writes and sings from the heart.

Genre/Style: American / Singer-Songwriter
Melvins
Houdini Live 2005

Release Date: 05/16/06
Label: Ipecac
CD: $16.98

Inspired by the invitation to the All Tomorrow's Parties "Don't Look Back" event, where bands convened to play one of their classic albums in its entirety, and the Melvins did indeed play "Houdini" (with Trevor Dunn on bass this time). Unfortunately they didn't record those 2 shows but did re-enact and record the entire mess again in SoCal. It was an invitation-only show, so for those of us not "on the list," here's the document. Mind-boggling.
Genre/Style: Rock / Metal

The Raconteurs
Broken Boy Soldiers

Release Date: 05/16/06
Label: V2
CD: $16.98
LP: $19.98

The Raconteurs are a new band made up of old friends, consisting of Jack Lawrence (bass), Patrick Keeler (drums), Brendan Benson (guitars, vocals, keys) and Jack White (guitars, vocals, keys). The seed was sewn in an attic in the middle of a hot summer when friends Jack White and Brendan Benson got together and wrote a song that truly inspired them. This song was "Steady, As She Goes" and the inspiration led to the creation of a full band with the addition of Lawrence and Keeler. While each of these four individuals have had successful careers with their own bands, the culmination of all of their talents is what truly makes The Raconteurs a force to be reckoned with.

Genre/Style: Rock / Pop

Radio 4
Enemies Like This

Release Date: 05/16/06
Label: Atlantic
CD: $12.98
LP: $14.98

Enemies Like This refines the band's signature sound while taking it to the next level, which in this case means a return to a rawer, more emotionally-charged sound of their earlier material. The new album deiivers politically charged, intelligent lyrics over funk riff guitars and deep throbbing dub grooves. They will be playing the shit out of this at Secret Dance Night.
Genre/Style: Rock / Pop / Dance

Russian Circles
Enter

Release Date: 05/16/06
Label: V2
CD: $13.98 Sale $9.98
LP: $16.98

After all the promotion, the interviews, the advertisements, the onesheets, the haranguing from publicists, it all boils down to one thing: does this band have it -- that impossible-to-define something that you can't explain, but instantly recognize? Even though they don't play the most accessible music -- an instrumental amalgam of punk, metal, indie-rock and even prog -- Russian Circles have it. "Enter," their debut album, definitely doesn't sound like a new band clumsily over-thinking their songs, but instead it sounds like one cohesive composition in six movements. Each movement holds its breath through the intense moments, but exhales through sweeping, airy horizons that slowly collapse into dense panoplies, showcasing the band's shifting dynamics, and not just the binary code of loud/quiet. Coupled with their richly textured guitar-work, thick, growling bass lines and propulsive, polyrhythmic beats, it's an exhausting 44 minutes, yet it'll still leave listeners wanting more.


Genre/Style: Instrumental / Post Rock
Thievery Corporation
Versions

Release Date: 05/16/06
Label: Eighteenth Street Lounge
CD: $16.98

This is the ultimate collection of remixes by Thievery Corporation. The album includes 18 dubbed-out versions of songs by a diverse group of artists including The Doors, Sarah McLachlan, Wax Poetic feat. Norah Jones, Astrud Gilberto, Nouvelle Vague, Anoushka Shankar, Transglobal Underground and many more. Also included is a brand new Thievery Corporation original featuring reggae legend Sister Nancy. Very hip, very smart, very Thievery Corp.



Genre/Style: Lounge / Down-tempo
Red Sparowes / Battle of Mice / Made Out of Babies
Triad

Release Date: 05/16/06
Label: Neurot
CD: $9.98
This three-way split features Red Sparowes, Made Out of Babies and Battle of Mice, all of whom have recorded material for Neurot Recordings. Red Sparowes have a full length and split with Gregor Samsa under their belt and contain members of both Neurosis and Isis. Battle of Mice features Josh from Red Sparowes and Neurosis as well as a member of Made Out of Babies. The vinyl is highly limited and colored.
Genre/Style: Post Rock / Metal / Experimental
Twilight Singers
Powder Burns

Release Date: 05/16/06
Label: One Little Indian
CD: $16.98

Greg Dulli – known and loved by many as the leader of pioneering alt-rockers Afghan Whigs – has recorded another album (his fourth) under the celebrated Twilight Singers’ moniker; and it’s a veritable masterpiece.

With every new recording Dulli cements his place as a national musical treasure, consistently turning out great albums bursting with a soulfulness too often missing from ‘rock’ records. Clearly enjoying the freedom allowed by the Twilight Singers’ ever revolving lineup, Dulli has pulled together an eclectic and viciously gifted lot for powder burns. Joseph Arthur, Ani DiFranco and Scott Bennett appear on the record, along with a guest spot from fellow Afghan Whig, bassist John Curley.

The album strikes an immediate impression; songs like "There’s Been An Accident", "Underneath The Waves" and "Forty Dollars" display Dulli’s songwriting perfectly; his lyrics -morose and uplifting in equal quantities- are complimented by his salient vocals. Dulli lets loose his spiraling tales of unyielding desires and personal regrets amid a wash of swirling guitars and string-driven orchestration. Beautifully arranged, the intricate production never gets the better of the songs themselves, always taking a back seat to the sentiment of the lyrics and Dulli’s swelling melodies. There’s no doubting the emotion in these songs.


Genre/Style: Rock / Pop
Various Artists
Pickin' and Singin'

Release Date: 05/16/06
Label: CMH
CD: $19.98

Gather ’round friends and music lovers for some of the finest pickin’ and singin’ you will ever hear! Featuring 64 performances by the masters of the Bluegrass including Lester Flatt, The Osborne Brothers, Mac Wiseman, Grandpa Jones and many more, Pickin’ & Singin’ is essential listening for bluegrass fans.


Genre/Style: Bluegrass / Americana
The Wedding Present
Search For Paradise

Release Date: 05/16/06
Label: Manifesto

CD: $16.98

This CD + DVD collection features the three singles from last year's critically-acclaimed "Take Fountain" album, plus all the B-sides, previously unreleased acoustic versions of the A-sides and a track remixed by the German pop group, Klee.

It comes with a bonus DVD of videos made for the singles and the outstanding album track "Don't Touch That Dial" together with a film made for an acoustic live version of "Perfect Blue," and bonus behind the scenes footage. The set includes 11 tracks never before released in North America!



Genre/Style: Rock / Brit Pop

   


Dinosaur Jr.
Green Mind / Where You Been?

Release Date: 05/16/06
Label: Reprise

CD: $11.98

Fronted by singer-songwriter/guitarist J Mascis, Dinosaur Jr. formed in Massachusetts in 1984. Their emergence was a musical shot heard round the world as Mascis and company put the heroics of lead guitar back into the forefront of the indie rock realm-amazingly, it was a revolutionary idea at the time. Post-punk and pre-grunge, they were an intense force to be reckoned with, and when the band signed to Sire in '91, Mascis' shreddingly unique alt-rock sound was cranked up for vast new audiences of eardrums. These expanded remasters of Dinosaur Jr's first two major label albums spotlight one of the most distinctive and influential artists of the '90s in prime form.



Genre/Style: Rock Pop

   
Tab Benoit
Brother to the Blues

Release Date: 04/25/06
Label: Telarc
CD: $17.98

Louisiana native Tab Benoit has been slinging his swamp-R&B-blues-rock concoction for the better part of 15 years, and from the sound of this disc's opening two tunes, it seems that little besides his backing band has changed. But when the title track kicks in with sorrowful fiddle, crying pedal steel (also played by Benoit), and a lovely, lonely honky-tonk melody, it's clear the singer/guitarist has decided to visit some unique territory. Country stalwarts Jim Lauderdale and Billy Joe Shaver swing by to provide duet vocals for Benoit's versions of their songs. Even Hank Williams Sr.'s "I Heard That Lonesome Whistle" gets covered as Benoit finds the blues at the heart of the country standard. Those who are not county lovers need not be concerned that Benoit has gone all George Jones on them. He still grinds out slabs of tough bayou rocking in the crackling "So High" and the opening "Pack It Up." There's also a heartbreaking, loungey, slow blues ("Somehow") and a soul-seared cover of Sam Cooke's "Bring It on Home to Me" that shows how effective Benoit is as an interpretive vocalist. The funky Little Feat/Neville Brothers-styled "Can't Do One More Two-Step" truly brings it home on a diverse outing that stretches boundaries and adds depth to Benoit's already impressive roots. --Hal Horowitz

Playing the Jewish Mother May 17.

Genre/Style: Blues / Country

 

T Bone Burnet
The True False Identity

Release Date: 05/16/06
Label: Columbia
CD: $18.98
Dual Disc Price:$19.98

Hot off the heels of being the chief music producer for "Walk The Line," "O Brother, Where Art Thou," amd "Cold Mountain," T Bone Burnett's highly anticipated record marks the first new music from him in 14 years. Featuring 12 compelling tracks, The True False Identity is destined to be another treasured record from one of music's greatest legends. The DualDisc version features intimate live music and spoken word performances by T Bone, making the first time T Bone has performed his own material on camera in more than 15 years.

Besides the music on CD the DVD features intimate live music and spoken word performances by him.



Genre/Style: Americana / Roots

Duke Robillard
Guitar Groove-A-Rama

Release Date: 03/14/06
Label: Stoney Plain
CD: $18.98 Sale $16.98

Perhaps his most ambitious album in a career that spans almost 40 years, Guitar Groove-A-Rama jumps out of the gate with the funky lead-off track, "Do the Memphis Grind," (with a tip of the hat to guitar greats James Burton and Steve Cropper) and never lets up. Along the way, Duke explores the grooves of Delta blues (Lil' Son Jackson's "Gambler's Blues"), jazz/gospel ("Sunday Mornin'"), Chicago blues (Sonny Boy Williamson's "One Way Out"), the soul of Ray Charles ("I'll Do Anything But Work"), the country blues of Bob Dylan ("Down Along the Cove") and even Irish folk ("Danny Boy"). In an album filled with highlights, the best may be the 16-minute tour-de-force "Blues-A-Rama," wherein Duke pays tribute to 10 guitar influences with an amazing performance recorded live in the studio.

Playing the Jewish Mother May 21.

Genre/Style: Blues / Jazz / Shred

Secret Machines
Ten Silver Drops

Release Date: 04/25/06
Label: Reprise
CD: $14.98
Honed by the immediacy of playing an 18-month cross-country tour in support of their debut album, New York City-based Secret Machines blend songcraft and melody with their acclaimed power to sculpt epic, dreamy, neo-psychedelic soundscapes on their second full-length album, Ten Silver Drops. While still playing homage to experimentalist pop groups Kraftwerk, Neu and La Dusseldorf with effects laden, heavily processed guitars and primal, stomping drums, Secret Machines expand their universe to reveal both the icy peaks and murky depths of their musical machinations.

Genre/Style: Rock / Psychedelic
Neil Young
Living With War

Release Date: 05/08/06
Label: Burgundy
CD: $17.98

Record of the Week. Who the hell does Neil Young think he is?  He’s just another commie, liberal, anti-American hippie criticizing the Bush administration with a new album called “Living with War.” Doesn’t he know our enemies are emboldened if they believe that the American public is not behind our efforts?  All these acid-dropping, tree-hugging, “sex, drugs and rock ‘n roll” entertainers wouldn’t know the first thing about protecting America from terrorists. On top of all that, he’s Canadian for God’s sakes! His opinion doesn’t matter if he’s not an American citizen. Like Skynyrd said “a southern man don’t need him around anyhow.”
 
Then again, he’s the artist responsible for “Broken Arrow”, “four dead in Ohio”, “Southern Man”, “The Needle and the Damage Done”, “Rust never sleeps”, Farm Aid, The Bridge School, “Cortez the Killer”, “Rockin’ in the Free World”, “Lets’ Roll.” and has been living and paying taxes in the U.S. for over forty years. So it’s not surprising that he has the audacity to release a concept album about the Iraq War that is so direct and specific than many people will be uncomfortable with it. It was recorded very quickly with an electric back up band and a one hundred singer choir that makes the songs stand out from most of his other material.
 
Titles like “Lets Impeach the President” and “Lookin’ for a Leader” will never get on W’s I-pod and Young’s most powerful venom is unleashed on “The Restless Consumer” with its repeated mantra “Don’t need no more lies!” More personal songs like “Families”, “The Flags of Freedom” and the album’s closer, an accapella version of “America the Beautiful” serve to humanize the message. Neil Young’s music has always had as many detractors and supporters as the Iraq war itself so whether you like it or not will depend on your point of view. -Paul Shugrue



Genre/Style: Rock / Folk
   
Cities
Self - Titled

Release Date: April 06
Label: Yep Rock
CD: $13.98 Sale $9.98

Cities - four bright-eyed college kids, keen on creating a decidedly American brand of melancholic, but hooky, indie rock - have a bone to pick with those hipster highbrows focusing their attention across the pond. The bands self-titled Yep Roc debut slices through Brit-influenced post-punk with mid-90s, layered guitar rock, and the organic, indie aesthetic that was born in Chapel Hill, NC. Committing Cities sound to record was up to Brian Paulson (Beck, Superchunk, Wilco, Rosebuds), whose knack for straightforward production allowed the band to transfer their sweeping, moody epics to disc.

Playing at Relative with Asobi Seksu on 6/10

Genre/Style: Rock / Post Punk / Awesome

Madlib
Beat Konducta vol 1-2 Movie Scenes

Release Date: 03/21/06
Label: Record Label
CD: $14.98 Sale $11.98

Following up his successful Beat Konducta vinyl only releases, Madlib rounds out his first CD collection of hip hop instrumentals with Beat Konducta vol 1-2 : Movie Scenes. These new, orginal tracks have been culled from the now-legendary beats CDs which provided the basis for Madlib's 2004-2005 productions from Madvillian, Quasimotot and Jaylib. Movie Scenes presents a vivid hip hop soundtrack for each mood in the model of vintage "library records" made for TV and film background music in the funky 1960s & 70s. Each of the 40 tracks has a title as well as a parenthetical mood or theme to correspond with what's unfolding on the screen. The film is for you to imagine, the score courtesy of Madlib the Beat Konducta.

Genre/Style: Hip-Hop / Jazz / Funk

Rahim
Ideal Lives

Release Date: 04/04/06
Label: French Kiss
CD: $12.98 Sale $8.98

Debut full length from this NYC based indie rock trio. Blending elements of the Talking Heads, The Beatles and Blonde Redhead for a unique sound all their own.

 

Genre/Style: Rock / Post Punk

Snowden
self-titled

Release Date: 01/08/04
Label: self-released
CD: $6.98

This is Snowden’s debut EP. Snowden formed in the summer of 2003 in Atlanta and have been steadily captivating local audiences. Creatively utilizing such influences as My Bloody Valentine, Radiohead and The Cure, Snowden give the listener an excellent debut cdep featuring six tracks. Lead by Jordan Jeffares on vocals and guitar, Snowden are a five piece which does a very good job of blending reverb saturated guitars and keyboards for a lush sound which is anchored by catchy bass hooks and complex rhythmic patterns.



Genre/Style: Rock / Pop
Spankrock
YoYoYoYoYo

Release Date: 04/18/06
Label: Big Dada
CD: $14.98 Sale $9.98
LP: $17.98
This is going to blow your mind! Cutting edge without really caring, phenomally rude without even meaning to be, this is Spank Rock. Don't be the last one on your block to know, the party is on.

Genre/Style: Hip-Hop / Booty House / Baltimore
   
Astronautalis
Mighty Ocean & Nine Dark Theaters
Sale $11.98
Mission of Burma
The Obliterati
Sale $15.98
Red Sparrowes | Gregor Samsa
Split
Sale $11.98
Shooting at Unarmed Men
Yes! Tinnitus!
Sale $11.98
VCR
Power Destiny
Sale $13.98
The Walkmen
A Hundred Miles Off
Sale $15.98

Click HERE for a full list of this week's releases.

Mailorder is fun! Submit orders HERE

1) Email us your selections    2) We send you a total    3) Payment via PayPal    4) Shipping is FREE


TUES MAY 16, 2006


Paleo | site & sound
Johanna Kunin | site & sound
Great White Jenkins | site & sound
OK Bird | site & sound

Time: 8pm
Tickets: $5 adv | $7 day of show
Relative Card: 50 points

aint nothing wrong .

I wish I was cool enough to wear sunglasses all the time. Indoors or at night, the grocery store or behind the sales counter. I am willing to bet Paleo can do it. A sound similar to Devendra Banhart that has been on the receiving end of a whopping from NIck Cave - dark, poetic songs for sunglasses at night. He will be accompanied by Johanna Kunin, a siren songstress who oozes elegance and sophistication behind her keys. The Great White Jenkins will be coming down from Richmond to us tales from the sea and bringing their friends, The OK Bird who will provide a snappin' your fingers strum session.

WED MAY 17, 2006


Elevado | site & sound
9volt Penpal | site & sound
Random Effect | site & sound

Time: 8pm
Tickets: $5 adv | $5 day of show
Relative Card: 50 points

 

they were gypsy pirates .

One thing I have yet to do is go to Australia and free dive for pearls. I know this task will be next to impossible for the statistics of finding one, I would have to find 3 tons worth of oysters, just to find 1 or 2. Luckily, Elevado will save my life. They know I can't hold my breath for long periods of time and have decided to seduce us with their vaudevillian sound of loops and multi-instrumentalist talents. Keeping everybody programmed in will be 9voltpenpal, Norfolk's own disco-tronic, fanny shaker-maker. Also, hailing from Norfolk, is Random Effect. This night will be phun for dancers, trancers and prancers.

FRI MAY 19, 2006


The Silent Years | site & sound
Headlights | site & sound
Foxes Through Fences | site & sound

Time: 8pm
Tickets: $5 adv | $7 day of show
Relative Card: 50 points

You be wearin' bobos .

When I was a child, I wanted nothing more than a pair of velcro shoes. My mother told me I couldn't have a pair until I learned to tie my shoes. Was it cruel? Was it tough love? Did I walk around barefoot for the next six years in protest? Are The Silent Years playing a hybrid of acoustic driven shoegaze sound with Polyvinyl darlings Headlights? Do Headlights yield upbeat dancescapes with synthie aftertastes? Will Foxes Through Fences leave us slackjawed with their Mogwai-esque post rock? Will I answer any of these questions? Yes, and many more Friday night.

SAT MAY 20, 2006


Ghostfinger | site & sound
The Fame | site & sound
Beat Strings | site & sound
Still Pink | site & sound

Time: 8pm
Tickets: $5 adv | $7 day of show
Relative Card: 50 points

rollie fingers is a friend of mine .

I was the worst baseball player ever. EVER. I was always put in right field, thats where they put the people who couldn't catch worth a damn. Ghostfinger would be the pinch hitter, knocking out a mix organ and guitar driven metalgrass (a cmbineation of metal and bluegrass), seriously Ghostfinger is hawt! The Fame probably played shortstop, all they do is play catchy hooks in the vain of The Cars or early Tom Petty. Beat Strings, from Iowa, are all about being behind the plate - throwing out rock jams and catching fly balls. Norfolk's Still Pink is rounding the bases and putting stickers on each one, reminding you why they are one of the best three piece rock bands from the area. Slide in, head first Saturday night, Pete Rose style.

SUN MAY 21, 2006


Ghostfinger | site & sound
@ THE GHENT TAPHOUSE!

Time: 10 pm
Tickets: $5
Ages 21 and up

clubman is your only choice .

Can we talk seriously? There are somethings you may or may not know about us. When I tell you things like, "Ghostfinger is insane and uncontrollably fun.", "We don't hang out enough at The Taphouse." or "I love you, but I've chosen moustache." I need you to believe me, because I believe in you. This show is going to be bonkers, I bet if you dump a beer over your head Ghostfinger will lick it off your face then write a song about called Camaro Hairball or something. Sundays are the new Wednesdays!

SUN MAY 21, 2006



The Season | site & sound
Joanna Lynne | site & sound
Think Tank | site & sound


Time: 8 pm
Tickets: $5
Relative Card: 50 points

cowtails and candy corn .

Candy is disgusting. I have never had a sweet tooth, but in a cruel twist of fate, I have had a cavity. Probably from another addiction. Not chocolate or pudding or chocolate pudding, but I crave sweet piano driven rock a-la The Season. They have been keeping dentists busy all across the lands and with their graceful tunes. ADA and RTR approved. Also on the bill is Think Tank - post rock from Chesapeake believe it or not! If you have yet to see this then make sure to bring a lead blanket to protect your viscerals. It's the Atomic Fuzz!

MON MAY 22, 2006



Tel Aviv | site & sound
The Luxary Flats | site & sound


Time: 8 pm
Tickets: $5 adv | $7 day of show
Relative Card: 50 points

my tv tells me I am crazy .

Have you seen the show Lost? Or The Sopranos? I haven't. People look at me like I'm not American or some shit? I always retort, "Have you experienced Tel Aviv?" and give them a look like their not American. Seriously, this band is so amazing, you have to pronounce amazing like, AH-MAY-ZING! Dark, melodic and chic indie rock similar to Massive Attack but with a more brash approach on the keys. What if Murder City Devils woke you up and you shared cinnamon buns? Seriously, would you miss this show? Sharing the bill is The Luxury Flats, think Jonathan Richmond. Also think of Judge Reinhold washing his car in Fast Times. Yeah, think of that and come out to the show that's not to be missed.

TUES MAY 23, 2006



Langley Holland | site & sound
An Epic At Best | site & sound
Lacrymosa | site & sound
Wes Mason | site & sound


Time: 8 pm
Tickets: $5
Relative Card: 50 points

lover you should have come over .

This is really a great night for singer-songwriter showcasing their talent. Listening to all the bands, all I can say is, "Wow". Langley Holland have the traits of an early Nada Surf, charming songs that are, simultaneously, downtrodden and hopeful. An Epic at Best is also on the bill and they are fantastic. They rock in the same way that Death Cab rocks, which isn't really rockin', just really great.We invited local lovemaker, Wes Mason to the bill and he has an incredible voice. He told me that he's thinking about doing a Jeff Buckley cover! We <3 JB! And the dark folk seductress, Lacrymosa will be in the house providing their beautiful melodies and gorgeous harmonies. Only insects will miss this.

UPCOMING SHOWS


Scribble these pronto!

05/26 - The Assault
05/27 - River City High, Foxtrot Rio
05/30 - Blackfire Revelation
05/30 - Jetpack
06/02 - Tuxedo Killers
06/03 - Jeremy Okai Davis Art Show w/Probably Vampires


FMI: www.relativetheoryrecords.com


MAY 14 thru MAY 30 | 2006

Simply Said
artwork by
Said Martinez-Calderon

A Student at the Governor's School for The Arts, Said will be holding his senior exhibition here at Relative Theory Records. His work recycles materials into visual diplays as drawings, ceramic sculptures and paintings. He was born in Mexico City and while he may not consider himself an artist, art is what he does. It is a means of expression for all individuals and his expression is on display right now. Simply Said.

Relative Brews

Regular Brew:
Organic Sumatra- Soft rounded flavor known for its high notes.

Flavor of the Moment:
Southern Butter Pecan

Decaf Brew:
Decaf Costa Rican

Remember Relative Cardholders:

Drip coffee any size is only $1 all the time.
Also whenever you spend $14.98 or more at Relative Theory Records you get a complimentary beverage of your choice. Any size. Any kind.

Check www.relativebrew.com for the skinny on cafe jamz!

Cafe Specials

Some like it hot. Some like it cold.

In celebration of life, the Relative Cafe is offering $2 lattes, mochas, or cappucinos--any size, any milk type! STEAM IT! ICE IT! WORK IT!

New Organic Products:

  • Newman's Own Peanut Butter/Peppermint/Caramel Cups
  • Newman's Own Pretzel Rounds
  • Krispy Bites
  • Veggie Booty
  • Woodstock Trail Mix
  • New Shapes!

    Attention all Bakers: Relative Theory is looking for people who make vegan products. If you make the ill na na please let us know because we will proudly serve your goodness to our customers. You may notice a slight price increase as we are carrying Organic milk now as well as Rice milk, Soy Milk, and Almond milk. These things are better for this planet and also more expensive but we all need to set better examples. Ciao baby!


    New To The Menu

    Newman's Own Organics
    Finally here - you need to come get some of this oooey gooeey madness! I am just playing not all is ooey and/or gooey. Our snack menu is now not only healthy but importantly healthy. Click Here to read some more about how the Newman's help this planet.

    Also we have a new Jet Tea Smoothie flavor.
    PEACH! Pear is on the way! I love this new baby food series.

    Now Available

    PomWonderful the dopest Pomegranate Juice. Loaded with more antioxidants than found in green tea, chocolate, and blueberries, PomWonderful helps our bodies fight against free radicals. Drinking one glass of this delicious juice, exercising and eating healthy every day will improve your cardiovascular health, prevent cancer, and fight the aging process. So, what are you waiting for? Stop by and help save your life! Enjoy a bottle today and every day. Choose one, two, three, four or five of the five flavors! 100 % Pomegranate, POM Blueberry, POM Cherry, POM Mango, POM Tangerine.

    Come On Out

    DuBBuddies Night
    get up get down!
    8 PM

    Next Monday [5/22]:
    Our mix theme is keyboards. This will be in honor of Tel Aviv and Luxary Flats. We need to make cds to show them we are really special people here in Norfolk. I am playing. Make a cd, come out and enjoy the show.

    What is DuBBuddies?

    This is our weekly mix CD night. Bring a mix CD and trade it with a friend or meet someone new. It is every Monday night and the cafe runs special bargains, like $2 mixed lattes (any size, you pick the flavors). Sometimes we schedule a movie, a live show, or we just hangout. Come get into some new music.

    SUPPORT YOUR COMMUNITY


    It will grow and you can help.

    Dynomite! Our eighteenth newsletter appears right on schedule. Well last night we had multiple funnymen grace the stage here at Relative and I would like to recap on the funniest moment that I can recall. Hmmm... let's see. I am going with Michael Showalter's Dream Jokes. That bit had me rolling. There is something clever about mixing funny and not funny that gets my hands clapping. If you want to know more I will post a review on teh site today or tomorrow. Enjoy the moustaches and hope to see the first giving page shoot high with donations! Enjoy these observations.


    Music: Gregor Samsa
    Film: Who Killed the Electric Car
    Art: Serge Seidlitz

    Feel free to write and tell us what you like or don't like it. Comments



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